The first call

Two weeks after the first donor list had come out I had bitten my fingernails down to stumps and almost worried myself into a stomach ulcer. Each day passed and I counted the hours til the three week mark. The office had told us that the matching process isn't complete until three weeks after the list goes out, so we waited and waited and waited. After only 2 weeks we got our first call. It was the coordinator calling to make sure that we were still on board and that I didn't get pregnant naturally (haha!). She then disclosed, against office policy, that we had been chosen by more than one couple. I WAS ELATED. I felt like I was walking on clouds. After all of this stress, anxiety, worry and waiting we might finally be moving in the right direction.

They told me that they had to get everything firmed up and then we could get started. I spent the next week beside myself with joy. I finally was back to that stage where I could envision what it would be like being pregnant and having a child. In the earlier months of TTC I had all these beautiful visions of what motherhood would be like. I would spend summer afternoons sitting outside, waiting for Bry to get home from work and find his wife and child waiting anxiously for him. The while he changed his work cloths, our child and I would lay on the bed and make funny faces at each other while he told us about his day. I could smell her, and feel her and know the joy of her presence. It had been a long time since I had let my heart go there. I could finally dream again.

Again, we had another agonizing weeks wait...