I am sure that most of you have heard about this woman in CA who gave birth to octuplets. What I recently learned is what stunned me the most. The woman has 6 kids already, is a single mother living with her parents, filed for bankruptcy a little over a year ago and used fertility treatments to get pregnant. Is this woman crazy or just stupid? It sounds as if she had IVF to get pregnant. What in the heck kind of fertility clinic puts in enough embryos to become pregnant with octuplets. Even if all the kids are identical (which is like 1 in a million) that is a minimum of 4 embryos, probably more. There is some speculation that she used fertility drugs on her own to get pregnant which makes her even crazier. What kind of life do these children have to look forward to? The grandfather is having to go back to his native country of Iraq to be able to provide for all of these children. Sounds to me like social services really needs to be involved.
Here is part of the story on CBS News
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5 comments:
You did IVF too so you know that there is NO WAY any clinic put 8 embryos into one woman. There is SO much more to this story. It is more likely she took the meds, grew the eggs and then did the IUI with another doctor who wasn't monitoring her and didn't do a scan or had sex after the eggs were there.
So to play Devil's advocate: The duggars have 18 kids and we all celebrate them. Why? Because they have two parents? Because their kids came one (or two) at a time? This woman sounds like she lives with her parents, and it sounds like they are all very engaged in raising these kids. That is a good thing.
While I personally question why a mom of six would have more, what was she to do once she knew she was having 8 more? Abortion was out of the question (which I know you can relate to). I repsect her choice to carry on with that pregnancy.
What irks me about the coverage: The news keeps staying "implant". If ONLY it were that simple!
So my final thought is this: Are babies just the provenance of the wealthy? We hear ALL the time, how could they have more kids? How can they afford it? I have made the decision to stop at 2. We feel confident we can put two thru college and help two buy their first home and keep two in clothes and food and toys. But if I won 43 million dollars tomorrow, would have have more? Yes. The news always makes it sound like poor people are selfish to have children. People always shake their heads when they hear that someone who lives in the projects in a one bedroom apt just had her fourth child. But you are a mom of two and you know how amazing it is to have kids. We don't insist you open your accounting books to see if you should try again. And I wouldn't want people looking at mine.
But, all that said, I think this woman is just crazy!! As much as I would love to have tons of kids, I think I would have stopped at 6!
-Anon J
Anon J - You brought up some great points that I too have been mulling over in my head since yesterday. Why can some people have 16 or 18 kids and we don't think they're nuts. I think there are a number of people who might say that in the Duggars case they are a little nutty. I secretly envy their family of 17 or 18 (or whatever they're up to). I don't love kids raising kids but there is a lot of love there.
What bugs me about this Mom of octuplets is that we both know she didn't get pregnant "above board". No IVF clinic (unless there are some back ally clinics I am unaware of and even still) is putting back 6 or 7 or 8 embryos in a young healthy woman. So the way this woman got pregnant was a lie of some sort. If you have a stable family and conceive honestly then go for it.
As far as whether multiple children should be a privilege, for me the frank answer is Yes. In this country woman have kids (often on purpose) that they cannot afford. While I don't want the government "cutting off" your ability to have as many kids as you want I still think it's a personal irresponsibility. I didn't do an essentially free round of IVF in December because if we bought the house then we would have been tight on money.
Well, that is what I am talking about. You didn't do that Dec IVF because you KNEW it would make things tight. I think that is the right choice. I think smart people think like that.
BUT not everyone is as smart or savvy as you. And while I, too, condemn this woman as being stupid and crazy (for lack of better words) I also think that she just wants to have babies and a big family. And what she is at fault at here is not being financially smart. She probably has lots of credit card debt and is yet another person in this country who doesn't understand personal finances.
And I feel lucky bec. I look at my girls and feel like our family IS complete. The four of us.
What I think we both agree on here is that there is A LOT more to this story. I'm guessing that she is so secretive bec. she did something in a sneaky way. I wonder who will break this story open. People? Us weekly? USA Today? Matt lauer?
- anon J
Regardless of her financial and marital situation, it is irresponsible to attempt to carry eight fetuses (feti? I don't know) as a human being. And by allowing eight embryos to be implanted, that is exactly what she was doing.
I do believe that we all have a social and moral obligation to care for our own children. And by that I mean you can, in general, pay for and coordinate their care without overarching and ongoing social assistance. If that means you can pop out 18 kids and do that Duggar style, so be it. Maybe that means that you have only one. You don't have to be rich to have alot of kids--I know plenty of families who have more than two children and are not at all rich--but they care for their own. And maybe that is what this woman intends to do...only time will tell.
Personally, I think it's irresponsible to bring children into a one parent household. Sometimes a household becomes one parent after the fact, which is always sad, but to start out that way is not right in any income bracket.
~Anon C
The plot thickens: "There were frozen embryos left over after her previous pregnancies and her daughter didn't want them destroyed, so she decided to have more children."
This is from an article on 1010wins.com
I wish we knew the truth to this mess!
-Anon J
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