Inching closer

As my younger sisters due date rapidly creeps closer I feel a little like a person standing on a cliff. Maybe someone will come and push me off the edge and maybe not. Maybe my sister will finally grow up and think of someone other than herself. Maybe she won't. Maybe things will go so poorly that social services has the intervene. Maybe they won't. Maybe she will pick up the pieces of her own life. Maybe it will have to be me. I just don't know. I hate having so little control. I hate not knowing what tomorrow brings. I hate that this little girl is being brought into a world where we can't feel elation for her making her way into the world. Instead all I feel is foreboding fear. I am scared for her. I wish I could do more to help her but I am helpless. Pray for this little girl. She needs it.